Some People Knit the Most Fucked Up Shit

Since I’ve joined Ravelry (totally late in the game), I’ve been browsing patterns and I’ve found some pretty crazy shit.  And some pretty ingenious shit too.  Now, I don’t want to rain on anyone’s creativity parade, but sometimes I just have to say “Really?” and “What the fuck?”

For instance, while browsing, I came across a knitted jock strap.  Actually 2 knitted jock strap patterns, one for sale and one for free.  And a crocheted version, too.  Seriously?  I mean, I love My Guy to pieces, but I really wouldn’t want his junk resting in the beautiful mohair, wool, what-have-you, I just spent $15+ on.  For that matter, I wouldn’t even want his balls in the Peaches ‘N Cream cotton stuff I spent $2 on.  Topped with the fact that I’d have to hand wash this funky smelling thing?  No thanks.

I also found a penis cozy.  What the hell?  Please see above rant.

How about a knitted digestive system?  Really?  Why?  What reason do you have to knit such a thing?

Okay, now can we move to toilet paper cozies?  Seriously?  I’ve seen tp cozies shaped like a cactus, a Barbie toilet, and even Bender, that robot guy from Futurama.  I don’t know about you, but I just stick my spare rolls in a cabinet.  But that’s just me.  I also found a cozy knitted to look like a sushi roll.  Cute, but I wouldn’t knit that shit either.

One thing I did find during my meanderings on Ravelry is a knitted buddha.  It’s pretty awesome, but then again, I’m into that sort of thing.  At this very moment, someone could be blogging about how you’d have to be crazy as shit to knit it.  Maybe I am.


NOTE TO READERS: To those of you who’ve knitted or designed one of the aforementioned items, you must have had a pretty good reason, one that’s just beyond my comprehension.  These are just my opinions, not the laws of the knitting gods, so please, no hate mail.  Although, if you do proceed to post something hateful, I do hope it’s entertaining.


I know the alpaca that made my yarn

At Stitches, My Guy and I stopped by this booth run by alpaca farmers.  A husband and wife, really nice folks.  They have 80 alpacas (80!) on their farm.  They do it all, from raising them to spinning yarn.  They were running a slideshow with pictures of their farm and the different alpacas.  They’re the cutest things.  Makes me want one for a pet.

I bought some lace weight yarn in a lovely shade of pink and the wife was able to show me a picture of the alpaca it came from – I think his name was Sunny.  How cool is that? 

I’m currently knitting a travelling fern lace scarf, a pattern I found on Ravelry.  Love that site. 


You Spin Me Right Round Baby, Right Round

I made it back from Stitches with quite a few goodies, courtesy of My Guy.  Yes, My Guy accompanied me to Stitches, and I wouldn’t of had it any other way, seeing as how he’s my best shopping partner and all.  He’s not a knitter, but he definitely has an appreciation for yarn and he felt and squeezed and petted all the pretty yarn right by my side.  And, as I mentioned, he paid the tab for my fiber indulgence..

Of the few things I picked up was a drop spindle and some roving.  We purchased it from a nice gentleman and a blind woman, not sure if they were married, but probably.  You know, when a couple seems so familiar with each other?  The blind woman amazed me as she spun on her wheel and then calculated our total and handed us our change.  It was truly a humbling experience.

The drop spindle is your basic run-of-the-mill spindle, not sure of its weight.  The roving is 8 oz. of Colonial, which they said would be an easy yarn for a starting spinner.  I’ve already spun a little over 90 yards, and I think I’ve gotten the gist of it, although I still have a lot to learn and perfect.  Planning on washing the yarn tonight.  Can’t wait to see the finished product!

It’s Not Every Day…

It’s not every day that you see three large yarn balls sitting atop a blue van.  But when you’re at Stitches Midwest, this is a regular occurrence.

Flying Fingers Van

This is Flying Fingers’ van, and although I’ve heard about it and seen it online, it’s definitely a sight to see in person.

I had a blast at Stitches, and so did My Guy, to his surprise.  He treated me to quite a few goodies, which I’ll be posting in the next few days.